dari kejauhan

merenung kosong ke arah yang aku sendiri tak pasti
mengimbas kesilapan diri
aku terfikir
adakah aku ini
layak disayangi...
layakkah???
kadangkala aku merasa jawapannya tidak
namun ku gagahi langkah ini
berbekalkan kekutan yang tersisa
dengan azam dan jati diri yang masih menghuni hati ini
supaya aku dapat terus melangkah ke hadapan
untuk mencuba menggapai apa yang aku sendiri tak pasti....

~speechless~
i oso donno y i write tis.....

bl0gging or faceb0ok?

me???prefer bl0gging....very interesting because can write longer than in facebook...~can exaggarate to0~
bcoz i know,not many ppl will read my bl0g la.other than that,i l0ve changing the layout and design.in short,we can show our creativity...~yeke?~

faceb0ok???
it's to open la...
i d0n't really like it...
but i 0n9 olmost everyday...LOL
not 0nly dat...i'll on9 olmost 5-6hrs/day...
damn f*** long...

+ fb is wasting time...
can't deny it...
mom oweys nag bout it...~n dad too~
other than tat,,,
in fb,,,no PRIVACY....~act i donno how 2 customize the privacy setting...LOL

s0,,,
the c0nclusion is,
for me,,,
blogging is more interesting....

~lalala~

nina n nyatin

two hot young lady...wakaka....

tis my 2 lil sis

ayip with rasyid

cute ayip oweys do cute face!!!

i don't really know tis rasyid

retarded.mentally.disorder.act

tis is my cousin

he's normal k...

my sepupu-sepapat

playing what?i don't know...

let them be...

enjoying their childhood

ayip again...

with his cute face of coz

aloha!!!

tis is me....

peace...

lil sis nina

she is lil...

cute???

of coz!!!

she's ma sis

my 'crazy' bro

mursyid aka playboy malaya

young yet flirty

smile or more likely to grin???

doesn't matter...

it's me!!!

ayip!!!

making his 'sengal' face...

LOL

mom n lil sis nyatin

not really lil act

taller than me...

haha...:)

mom n dad

loving couple 4 eva

.luv.them.so.damn.much.

i hate the perseption that girl must be very polite n soft....~bluekk~

well...i'm not a soft n polite one.just a very natural,easygoing one...i don't even know what the word hypocrit mean when it come to attitude.y is all ppl say that a girl must be soft.typical n consevative perseption.as for me,girls must be strong,not easily defeated by the guys.
                                    
                       I HATE GUYS THAT BULLY GIRLS


so to avoid being cheated by the guys,girls must be strong n smart...don't be easily cheated by the quite eyes bcoz they are pools of lies...~edited from bibsy soenharjo poem,he had such quiet eyes~...nowadays,the world are challenging.the guys are no longer like before who's born to protect.but now,guys are not like that....so girls...BE STRONG AND SMART

~boredom will kill me~

argh!!!!!feel so boring...no idea what to do this holiday...too long wor....feel like working....but who want to hire a 'kid' like me...they will absolutely say 'study la,adek'...don't they now...i feel very tired studying la....want to go touring...my dad is busy working lo...how to ask him to take us out...tommorow...i want to joging lah...and maybe can't till the boh tea plantation there...the view nice too...but afraid of the dog wor...n can't stand the fertilisers smell too...luckily got the playground nearby...can exercise lil bit...

things-to-do(for 2moro)
1)tidy all the book
2)hw lil bit
3)watching CSI
4)jogging~want to lost weight ooo~
5)blogging if hav things to write....

finished dy~

~moved from ipoh dy~

24th of november,wednesday
we moved to ringlet,cameron highland
nothing much to say
i do think ringlet is quite ok....
hope here is better than ipoh environment(not only nature but culture n lifestyle oso)
but one 4 sure,it'll be hard for me to update my blog here
the internet is so damn slow....
ARGHHH!!!!!
that's the only thing that i don't like
others...
so far so good....

my favourite malaysia athletes list~top 5~

male

1st place goes to.....~drum roll~
bryan nickson lomas from diving

2nd place goes to.....~drum roll~
koo kien keat from badminton

3rd place goes to.....~drum roll~
josiah ng from track cycling

4th place goes to.....~drum roll~
azizulahasni awang from track cycling

5th place goes to.....~drum roll~
azlan mubin from sepak takraw

female

1st place goes to.....~drum roll~
datuk nicol ann david from squash

2nd place goes to.....~drum roll~
leong mun yee from diving

3rd place goes to.....~drum roll~
elaine koon from gymrama

4th place goes to.....~drum roll~
wong mew choo from badminton

5th place goes to.....~drummer tired aldy~
chai fong ying from wushu

okay....finished

~dissapointed~

today,malaysia 'sepak takraw' team lost to THAILAND in the final match at the 16th asian games guangzhou,china.as a malaysians i do hope they can grab the gold medal but what to do.the gold is not fated for them and for us too.but i do hope the can do something in inter-'regu' event.as for the team event we aldy got to see the silvers shine,but for the upcoming event i do hope more.this night,koo kien keat n tan boon heong will be meeting markis kido-hendra setiawan from indonesia men's double final.they're great guys and i hope they can show great and superb performance today.last but not least,for my cute bryan nickson lomas,chaiyok dude....eventhough diving events is not yet starting but good luck in advance ya....

koo n tan...

chaiyok guys....

ohh cute bryan...

do the best ya!!!

futra abd ghani(yellow jersey) in action....

looking forward for spm next yr

wargh!!!start to feel the heat right now.feels like i don't want to take spm,but then how can i further studies and achieve my dream rite?

to-do-list for this hldy to improve my study lil bit here n there
1)homeworks(given by the teachers)
2)add math~lots of exercise~
3)physics...have 2 revise all the things n understand all the concept that i didn't undrstand b4
4)arabic...this hldy will be used to revise qawaid 
5)biology....need to do alot of reading n understanding all the fact
6)chemistry...chapter 1-3...bcoz there're lot of formula...very sui la
7)sej....want to memorise all the facts...~.tired of facing it dy~
8)qs...have to memorise surah sajadah n surah yaasin
9)psi....want to revise the hukum2
10)maths modern...do the exercise

seem that i have a lot to do...hope that can do all these...as for bm n bi....i donno what to write but do have work to complete...for bi...essay n for bm...the folio

time fo my beloved FAMILY

if before this,most of my post is about 4 KINDIGADEN,i think it's the time to talk about my family now.

this is my family member:


AR ALHAN B ABUDIN my beloved dad.work as a security guard at ringlet,cameron highland.44-yrs-old-the first child from sum of 2 only child of my grandparents.my father is really an understanding one...i really like to share with him because he didn't talk much but listen.if he think there's point to advice,then he'll voice it out....my father is really a strict one.he'll scold us if we do something wrong repeatedly.but for the firat time mistake he'll just advice.what an outstanding dad he is,rite????n 143 i love u...dad...

USMALELA BT ZABIDIN...my mom is as beautiful n unique as her name.she always nag,but i know it's for our own good.my mom is really a good cook n good in doing everything related to chores....my mom sew curtain n she's really good in it.my mom is now 39-yrs-old.i.luv.my.mom.so.damn.much

this is one of my mother work

ASYRAFUL MUNZIR..my big bro.17-yrs-old.currently studying at smt taiping.not really close to him.he's relly fond to silat n history.


NURZATIL AQMAR...lil sis of mine.14-yrs-old.rebellious one.taller than me.she's beautiful...can't deny it...

MUHAMMAD MURSYID...lil bro...12-yrs-old.a not very handsome but sweet playboy.even at this age, he has shown great playboy quality in him...haha...like to play around in everything...never serious...

MUHAMMAD MUSYRIF...he has the look that tell you..."I DON'T CARE".he's very natural but a lil bit hot tempered just like me.in my family he's the cutest boy.10-yrs-old cute boy.he's white.a lil bit chinese look.he is a good friend of mine n also a superb bro of mine....luv him...


NUR HUSNINA...the last child in our family(hopefully bcoz my mom and dad seem like wanting a new one...haha).7-yrs-old aldy but acting like a 5-yrs old girl.a spoiled girl.like to make up n buy girly things.nyway she's cute.n clever.almost 4get bout that.

we may fight most of the time...but that make us closer.silly rite???but that's the truth.

gallery time

at boh tea plantation

my lil sis..zatil n nina

my mom n dad

my bro with his friends...my bro is the one with brown sweater

a sad story + a very happy story

this paper is still quite wet

look ordinary....

but it means a lot to me....

ok....

time for story telling...

this time...sad story......

this papers contain comments about myself from all the class members.we do this activity on the last day of school led by zulkamal.he told us to take good care of this paper....but today....two of this paper missing.i put them in my camera casing.want to know how i realise???

as usual i'll read these comments during ample times.when i read it,i found that the two of them is not there.i ask my mum.
"mom.did us see two orange paper...small one...."i ask impatiently
"i think i sweep it aldy.try find it at the drain there"my mom said...

what!!!!in the drain....i ru as fast as lightning to find those papers.luckily i found it.when i realise that the papers are missing,i feel extremely sad.but when i found it,i feel a great relief....

                                                                      ok...
                                                            enough sad story
                                               now....it's the time to talk about glory

this is not the latest pic of him...but yes...this is my favourite athlete in cycling...

JOSIAH NG

luv him very much...haha....

this is the 'pocket rocket man'...

see how small he is than the other athlete

but he's great man

chaiyok...ganbatte....azizul....u can do it....

on this beautiful day...my favourite athlete in cycling,josiah ng,win silver medal in keirin in asian games,guangzhou,china.....i feel so happy.plus azizulhasni awang also win gold medal for malaysia...until now,malaysia has got 3 gold medal.

now...

it's the time for my favourite of all

BRYAN NICKSON LOMAS

i don't know why...but i like this man very much...he's so damn cute...how i wish i can meet him...just once...n it'll be enough for me for the whole life time...want to see how cute him is...

check these out!!!

pretty cool huh.....

so cute....

with yeoh ken nee...in 3m springboard synchronized at commenwealth games 2010

new delhi

feel like screaming...

                                          

with matthew mitchem n tom daley

10 m platform

also in delhi

oops...this is daley...cute too rite???haha...

i really hope that bryan can get medal in this asian games...can't wait to watch him dive....

chaiyok lomas!!!

jangan lemas di kolam ok.....

too sweet to be forgotten

4KINDIGADEN

MBOK TITI
my best friend forever....
i luv u so much
i'll never forget you no matter what...
u always be patient to wake me up from sleep...
i know that i'm not a good friend for you
that's why i don't mind u being close to nazer bcoz she's a perfect friend for you

SOFIA
i don't know why...
but even how 'gila-gila' u are
i still luv u fren.....
u have many things that is same wit me...
the way u think...
the way u feel...
the way u settling ur problem...

AJLAA
u r the one that can handle all my lecture...
kih3...
u r a very good leader...
n i know that u can carry all the responbility that comes with the post
u r the very sensitive n girly one...
tipical girl attitude

TIRAH
u r the very shy one
quite quiet
i don't have the oppurtunity to know u more b4
but this year i feel more comfortable with u....

UMIE
a tipical girl
very soft one
has mommy quality...haha...
but u r very cool....
patient....

AKMA
1 more tipical girl in the class
very2 oft
but sometimes u can be very strict too
usual attitude for an 'along'

WANIE 
MO in the ouze...
i found that sometimes i feel uncomfortable with u
however u r very cute
u have the talent in art
n i hope u can be a good PKU 2 too.

AIMI
the most suitable word that can give clear picture bout u is
very MOMMY style
u r very matured
n wat i know most bout u is u like to read
u r very neat
full of spirit when doing something


AINA
the korean craze
u r very hardworking one
neat  too
clever girl


MAS
very cute
wat a cute voice u have
a sensitive girl
but can be very strict too


QIQI
happy-go-lucky
hardworking
eventhough i have just spent a year with u i feel that i'm very comfortable with u



BEBEYH
the tough lady
i just like it when u 'sound' the guys bcoz they'll follow it
eventhough u r the most annoying one(only during my period)
i still luv u fren
i luv chatting with u too


NAZER
u r a good girl
'alim' is the correct word  u babe
but..eventhough u r 'alim'
u know how 2 advice ppl according to their attitude
ur advice is gold fren
u r a good fren...
to me...
n to mbok titi


CHE NAB
celuyh!!!!
u r a beautiful girl
but ur slang is really....'pekat'
u r the very hardworking one


KINAH
i found that it's very fun being fren with u
even i only start being close with u tis yr
i juz luv u
juz the same with my other close frens
seriously....


AQIL
hmm....
u r like my bro
so cute
feel comfortable with u
u really have many things in ur head...


SEPOL
the creative man
sleepy like me
but always call me sleepy
u can be a successful designer dude...
just go for it
sometimes we have to fight for dream
show ur determination 2 ur parents
mybe they'll let u...


HUSNUN
as always...
i'll describe u as
true tipical guy
rarely express what u feel...
but i can see it from ur face...
bcoz it is damn clear...
especially from ur big eyes dude
expressing feeling is not a crime...


CUNI
the one who already change much
from a very quite n stern one
u have become more humour
sometimes
u shine my day with ur funny attitude


NOMAD
the responsible monitor
eventhough at first u are quite a 'sengal' monitor
time change u
u is very....thrifthy
but the most important thing
ur face is like the officer at the library...
haha...


FAREED
spoiled boy...
but u never admit it...
i know that u r a lonely one
bcoz u r the only child in family
u r natural
no hipocrit in ur dictionary


SABIL
natural...
sorry bcoz i raised my voice at u
i didn't mean it k...
as a fren...
i think...
u're great


NUAR
joyce jambu
at first i hate u bro
but time passed n u've changed
you've become a good fren
at the same time
u oso can give advice
sometimes i feel guilty...
bcoz...
i hate u before.....


NABIL
really like to talk bad
but u r a funny man dude
really a shy man
quiet one too
that's why i can't describe u much...
bcoz i don't really know u eventhough i have spent 4 yrs in the same class with u


DM
'utara' man sejati
ur slang is cannot be changed
but that make u so funny dude
u r a good man
n u have something special in u


TJ
haha...
i'll even laugh when i see ur face
u don't have to make joke to make ppl laugh
u r really good in islamic knowledge
but u juz don't show it so much
n most important
u r a special one in the 4 KINDIGADEN


ZUL
u r really funny dude
ur joke is silly
but yet
it is so entertaining
i'll remember ur silly joke
i don't know how dull will it be without u in the class next yr

4KINDIGADEN has a special place in my heart.And i'll keep this in my heart forever.Never ever forget it.All the memories is too sweet to be forgotten.I don't know how dull my life will be without u all next year.Swear...this is true from my heart....Thank you to you all 4 being a great friend to me eventhough i know that i'm not a good friend to you all.I'll remember the History quiz fine which have be a very fun time to me eventhough it is the fines.All the fines has bring us together.Closer as friends...I'll also remember having Chemistry class at the Dataran Ilmu with Teacher Anisah.It is freaking hot but fun....with all jokes that we have...seriously...it is fun.We are the only class that not fight bcoz of sitting site graph in class.I'll also remember the time when the girls do 'mogok' after the batch meeting...but it didn't come true bcoz the boys r too sweet to be refused.If I write all the things that happen....I think the scroll on the com will not be enough....so better i stop here before the tears rolls down from my cheek

sometimes...we may loose something that we dont want to loose....

not all we WANT is GOOD for us
not all we DISLIKE is BAD for us
not all we LOVE  LAST FOREVER wit us
not all we HATE LEAVE us
we don't know what Allah fate 4 us till the day it comes
so we must be ready to face everything
we must be able to overcome all the obstacle that come into our lfe...
bcoz our life is a journey that is full of test...
THIS LIFE IS THE LIFE OF TEST
but till now i still feel sad bcoz next year KINDIGADEN is no longer exist...
the teachers have changed our class n i feel extremely SAD n UPSET bcoz of it
i don't know how will it be without all the 4KINDIGADEN members in the class next year
i'm sure that next year 5KINDI will be very dull without MBOK,AJLAA,SOFIA,TIRAH,UMIE,WANIE,KEMA,BEBE,KINAH,NAZER,CHE NAB,QIQI,AIMI,AINA,MAS,AQIL,SEPOL,FAREED,HUSNUN,NOMAD,CUNI,SABIL,NUAR,DM,NABIL,TJ n the last but the one that i'll rmmbr the most bcoz of his silly jokes...ZUL....
the will be no more KINDIGADEN but it will be DULL KINDI next year with TAIN in the class....
i'll remember all the things that happen in 4 KINDIGADEN 4 eva...i'll never forget it bcoz this memory is too sweet to be forgetten....

an incident n an accident!!!!

k...short story...
~an incident~ 
2day i go 2 tesco extra ipoh 4 some shopping...
got 2 buy thing 2 go back 2 hostel....
in the tesco...
i was searching 4 my things....suddenly a baby shout(happy shout) at me....
look like he or she(can't really recognise) wanted me to hold him@her
i juz giv a smile 2 him@her
then i hear the baby's mother say to the father who's holding tat baby ask
"What happen hney?",she ask
"I don't know.Look like our child like tat girl(which is me....haha...)"he replied.
then i juz giv a very sweet smile...haha....~praise me self~
then i juz i walk away...
oke...next story....which is an ACCIDENT 
after all things are paid
we heading our way back to home at tmn meru 3c...
since tat time is raining....
all cars are slow....
suddenly.....
BANG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
my car is crashed from the back...
actually my car almost turn upside down....i didn't get the chance to take the pic bcoz i left my beloved camera at home...
at tat time i realise....
we donno wat in front of us tat is fated by Allah...so we must oweys be ready n do amal tat we will bring when facing Allah at the 'padang mahsyar'
one more thing tat i learn...
oweys put solat fardhu on the top of all our to-do-list....
b4 i go to tesco...i hav perform isyak prayer...
after tat accident...i think...
if only i died in tat crash...n i didnt perform solah first....
nauzubillah...
i juz cannot imagine....

k...finished.....

Aku manusia biasa.....

aku tak mampu nak buat semua org puas hati....
dan aku sedeyh untuk itu
if i just can make all people around me to smile....
it will be a great pleasure for me...
but i realise that i cant do it...
bcoz i'm juz an ordinary homo sapien
i'm not ma'thum
even how hard i try to be a gud one...
i will still have tat mazmumah quality(mybe many n less)
but it is still there in myself
n i have to try hard 2 control it
and 4 tat i must have strong faith n most important...
Allah by my side(which i noe He's oweys there beside me)
Ya Allah,
please give me strength....
i just cant go through all these without You by my side.......
n along the way...
i hold this tightly in my heart....
we'll not reach perfection...bcoz there's oweys room 4 improvement...
n yet along the way....
we're gonna be better.....